The thing is, Robbie isn’t capable of dealing with this kind of wantonly ignorant accidental anarchism. He’s perfectly capable of innocent rule-breaking, when the stakes aren’t as high, but this rush to make a shitty situation worse makes him want to pull the covers over his head and belatedly feign sleep.

But Robbie, too, has always had a certain compulsion to poke things. Sometimes, he even dabbles in pushing buttons. Ignoring this much idiocy isn’t in his nature. He can’t help himself.

“That isn’t how electricity works, dude. That is literally the opposite of how it works, because the slippers are going to keep the current inside your body.” Robbie swings his legs out of bed and sits there, staring incredulously, because it just. Keeps. Getting. Worse.

“You can’t keep waking people up until someone agrees with you! Who does that?” He can’t let Mac head off to break into the kitchen with whatever stupid schmuck he talks into helping him with his Fox News safety sandals. Dammit. Robbie stands up and pinches the bridge of his nose. Fine, he’s involved now. “Let’s just go see if there’s any open, sanctioned, late night break room or something. Your munchies can wait til mañana, and FYI: even with that logic, it’s totally stealing unless you’re eating breakfast food and you skip breakfast in the morning.”

He slips on his own rubber sandals and gestures to the hallway. “Come on, if we can’t find anything better, I’ll kick your butt in suey.”